2021 Questions

I have many questions—I’ve always had many, many questions, even as a kid. Where I lived, in that culture, adults didn’t cater to the whims of children and their pestering questions, and certainly not the girl children. Our narrow and insufficient education evidenced as much time and time again—then and today. Shamefully neglectful and oppressive in the most staggering of ways, the powers that be crushed the curiosity and quelled the impertinent and inquisitive poors to an oh-so-poisonous degree, and ever so dramatically at times—I have many stories. I see it in younger generations in many cultures today—still, evidenced in the censorship sweeping across the States currently; that tendency to silence that innermost voice that begins to poke and prod at those open and caustic wounds of those old fudder-dudders that sit pious on their thrones of power where they purposefully and persistently are intent on hindering progress evermore.

So, I was determined at a very young age to ask as many questions as I possibly could, no matter how ignorant or ridiculous or nosey or impertinent or heretical, and to keep asking more as they were answered (on unanswered as the case would often be and rudely at that) even if I didn’t voice them aloud.

Regardless, questions, questions, questions are the foundation of a healthy mindset—and meandering towards answers always to find more questions, but y’all already know that about me, hopefully.

Since I am a college dropout and couldn’t afford a proper education (you know, one that racked up all those burdensome student loans for that expensive piece of paper hanging on your wall or stuffed somewhere in a box that gets you all those great jobs with great benefits and a living wage, supposedly?), I had to make do. Even when confronted with such blatant education discrimination (educationism) time and time again, I forged ahead reminding myself of the countless quotes from a minority of those older more astute fudder-dudders on the realization that you become more ignorant the older you get. At the ancient age of fifty-one, I aggressively and affirmably attest to that ethos because that is what it really is—a realization that you don’t have all the answers and you never will so don’t be arrogant enough to assume otherwise and as soon as you accept it and move on, you can really begin to learn.

On educationism—a prejudicial bias pits the educated against the under and uneducated in the United States, and elsewhere, that needs to be confronted, challenged, and shed if additional progress is ever to be made. But, that is another essay entirely and I don’t have the knowledge nor the expertise to traverse that pit, so I’ll leave that to the overly educated—I say that with great respect. For now, we will start with questions—glorious, wonderful, or not, questions.

I created a question diary.

These are questions I had over the course of the year that I probably should keep to myself, but as a philosopher (perversely contrary and curious creature that I am), I must ponder and meander and such. Having seen and felt the epic wave of censorship, I am determined to bring them to light so y’all can be as puzzled and disturbed and distracted by them as I was.

I apologize in advance—no disrespect intended (except towards those who refuse to extend any to begin with). Likely, these will probably already have answers (more than one in many cases), and if not, they’ll doubtless have answers from many know-it-all men that we women are very familiar; also, while some may lean towards a conspiratorial or a magical or fantastical mindset (sometimes on the extremes of romantic, erotic, whimsical, impossible, unrealistic, theoretical, nonsensical, cynical, nihilistic, fatalistic, masochistic, sadistic, psychotic, totally fucked up, etc.—I do so love to surf those edges), these questions in no way denotes endorsement of such (except where noted), especially when evidenced-based facts refute or affirm or render unknowable presently as much given the question or series of questions. Yes, we (really just lil ole me in many chaotic flavors—and if you hadn’t recognized that yet, I apologize for that spoiler) here at meanderings.me still affirm and attest to that ever so wonderful branch of systematic knowledge called science. Science is a wonderful, beautiful, and fascinating field, mindset, and expertise that I will always hold dear, but it is nothing without the humanities to soar and steady it. As a creator, my imagination often meanders toward the mysterious and outlandish far too often so deal with it or move along—I could really care less but welcome you if you choose to stay and participate. Remember: Sometimes you are not the intended audience of a thing, and that’s okay.

Since I had so many questions, these are a very small portion and edited in a sorta linear-type order from 1-JANUARY-2021 till 31-DECEMBER-2021, like a diary but in a list format. Some questions have been answered, fuckyouverymuch, and some are ridiculous musings that probably should’ve stayed personal—far too many mundane (I find inspiration in the mundane); some are vague and innocuous and some are just me infuriated and frustrated and yelling into the void (Damn Democrats! I don’t bother with Republicans). I did keep quite a few personal just cuz 😳. Many of y’all probably have far more fascinating questions that I would love to read. I challenge you to create and post your own question diary. Enjoy and may they bring you inspiration in the most bizarre and imaginative of ways!

Updated: I edited this list. A reminder—I go back and occasionally edit any of these posts since I don’t have a copy editor and I’m notoriously bad at catching my own errors. Also, and here’s a shocker most people won’t admit to, apparently—I change my mind, opinions, learn some new facts or information, and reevaluate my writing, and am not afraid to say so, including being totally wrong. That includes being an ass, but then I can be an ass *shrugs*. Also, asking some questions aloud comes at a very high cost as some questions are only asked by the privileged while the rest of us have to suffer in an oppressive silence. I’ll write more on this in a future post.

  • Shouldn’t we ask friends the same questions we would ask of enemies? Or acquaintances?
  • Who ‘we’???
  • Is DJT really that stupid? Or just that desperate? Both?
  • Are we supposed to believe that Joe Manchin will vote with Democrats? Have people not examined West Virginia as a state?
  • Why didn’t they ban him sooner? $$?
  • Why isn’t anyone saying that this pandemic could last at least 1-2 more years?? Have they not read history about previous pandemics?
  • Why isn’t the media acknowledging that DJT, Republicans, and followers are executing a coup? Are they complicit? Do they really not like democracy in the hands of us commoners? Was Democracy an illusion all along?
  • Do we really have a choice in leaders or is it a false choice? Like capitalism? Or utilities? Or having a period? Or a uterus?
  • Am I not supposed to question and be critical of people’s interpretation of things? Why not?
  • Who the fuck is Harry Styles and why is Oliva Wilde dating him?
  • Was DJT an ungovernable CIA/FED snitch paid to be the fool bad guy (the anti-Raymond Redington?) to coerce and rat out the other bad guys and test the boundaries of democracy who then surprisingly won with the help of nefarious forces and eventually became so high on his own stench of power and that of his followers that no one could control him? Was he a creation of Tom Clancy? Or some wanna-be-type-Jack Ryan-CIA-analyst sitting in a cubicle bored out of his fucking mind but wanted power in the most broad and indeterminate of ways because he hates women and black people and was bullied in boarding school?
  • Will Joe Biden be a progressive people president? Or will he be a conservative Republican president? Or will he be a corporate rich peepo president? Or will Jill be running the show? Or is he a pawn of the conservative Christian Catholic cabal?
  • Is progeria in a needle or pill format yet? Would they ever commodify it? Market it to anyone other than the rich? At reasonable prices? Will it stop my ass from sagging?
  • I wonder what Anita Hill thinks and feels about this moment in history?
  • Why is Space Karen so popular with men? Why do they deify him?
  • Why doesn’t Hollywood adapt more historical romance novels into series?
  • Why do people keep insisting that Hollywood is liberal??
  • Is the CW network a conservative Christian cabal’s propaganda campaign bent on social engineering and domination aimed at younger generations?
  • Is the reason the United States is the richest country on the planet because they keep so many of us in the world poor and so few of us rich?
  • How in the world are we supposed to get through a multi-year pandemic on $3,200??
  • Why doesn’t China allow Hong Kong and Taiwan to just be? Why are they so nosey and unreasonable and determined to be so exacting and unfair?
  • Is bipartisanship with the very people who got us into this mess supposed to be a diplomacy fake or is JB actually dumb (or naïve) enough to believe that these goons will negotiate in good faith after what PBO went through and what we’ve gone through the past four plus years??
  • Are we supposed to believe that in these poor little red states like KY and WV there isn’t election fraud knowing these states are numbers 49 and 50 respectively at the bottom of the pile—in everything??
  • Is Ganymede a secret base for aliens who are watching us and laughing their asses off? We are their dramedy entertainment? Or are they in cahoots with Space Karen and the other toxic boy billionaires?
  • Is Q based on some distorted patriarchal hellscape AI mutation whose data algorithms have run amuck in order to distort the actual truth?
  • Is Hollywood really that progressive?? Why do I feel like I’ve asked this so many times before?
  • Why are there so many Hollywood reboots? They are aware that there are tens of thousands of books out there that can be adapted, aren’t they?
  • Will someone ever remake the Alien franchise into a multi-season series?
  • Are crocodiles the new dinosaurs?
  • Are black holes the universes’ third eyes?
  • How much pollution are these space rockets spewing into the atmo?
  • Why are lots of rich peepo and celebrities dying in helos? Are they faking their death to go to another planet? Or are aliens faking their death and kidnapping them? Or, because of their status and wealth, they are statistically more likely to die in helos because they are in them far more than the average person and thus likely to crash?
  • Is Superman supposed to be Jesus, Christopher?
  • Does Superman, being an alien, not know how to kiss a human? Or does Clark Kent not know how to kiss Lois Lane? Or does Henry Cavill not know how to kiss Amy Adams? How can gorgeous people not know how to kiss other gorgeous people?? What’s her excuse? Do actors practice kissing like they practice acting? Shouldn’t they?
  • Superman dies?? But…???
  • What is wrong with Ben Affleck being batman?
  • I wonder if the media will report when those big mansions on the coasts start falling into the ocean cuz of climate change? Is there an app for that? Will there be a video game?
  • Perhaps TPTB should do what SGU did and put the unanswerable questions in a video game and see who answers them and what kind of answers they have?
  • John Cornyn’s threat to impeach future Democratic presidents—well, yeah, if they’re corrupt seditious autocrats bent on overthrowing the government, by all means, do impeach them—that is how that’s supposed to work, isn’t it? How is that complicated?!?
  • I’ve seen an alarming number of articles in the news that refer to a ‘fetus’ as an ‘unborn child’—have the journalistic standards changed? Or is this the result of the monopolizing & pilfering of local news by Sinclair? Or is that ugly Christian cabal insidiously at work again?
  • ‘I was representing my constituents’ is some ‘the customer is always right’ energy here, right?
  • We now have domestic terrorist extremist threat announcements & warnings??
  • How the fuck is Elizabeth Warren not President of the US?? The same reason HRC isn’t, right?
  • Are Evangelical Christians the only Amazon and Goodreads reviewers? These are the delicate flowers that call other people snowflakes??
  • Does the US use that ‘relationship is too valuable’ rationalization for all yo friends that use bone saws to cut up living breathing people into bits and bites??
  • What is the continued fascination with white male serial killers in this country? Is it the same as ‘the chosen one’ fascination??
  • What the fuck is a mary sue?
  • Do they actually believe they can overturn Roe and not get hit politically? Or financially? Or sexually? They really have no fucking clue what’s in store for them if they do, do they?
  • Is there a word for when a parent gets elderly & they attempt to gaslight you on how glorious your childhood was & how great they were as parents because the reality is too disparate for them to contemplate??
  • Does ‘Compromise’ in American politics usually mean that the working & poor people get screwed? So corporations can continue exploiting us as cheap labor sources?
  • Who doesn’t have a crush on Regina King?
  • People think historical fiction is nostalgic?!? I wonder if those are the same people that think historical romance is pure escapism? Or that mindfulness is entertainment? Or that nonfiction books are novels?
  • Do Republicans have selective memory loss when discussing Afghanistan? Or SCOTUS?
  • Are we supposed to pretend that white people and the US don’t do bad things?
  • Are DJT and BJ of UK the result of some white colonized incestuous coupling? Literally and metaphorically?
  • Why are we supposed to care about Kim and Kanye?
  • Do people not use Twitter as an educational resource? What about professional academics or researchers?
  • $4.25 an hour?!? To nanny kids?!?
  • Do rich people actually listen to themselves?
  • Does John Roberts really wanna bring down Democracy? Does he not see where Citizens United is taking the country? Is he that clueless or just stupid?
  • How on Earth in the 21st century is the filibuster still even a thing we have?? Ditto anti-abortion laws?? Ditto racism?
  • Is Marjorie-crazy-white-woman related to my mom and her nutter sisters?
  • I wonder if H***y found something out—other than the royal family’s racism—that was the last straw? Something to do with his mum? Or him? Should we send an invite and welcome him to the United States of ‘yeah, we cut our families off cuz they were being racist assholes too’ chapter?
  • What if the moon stopped rotating? What if a small unknown object hit it and it started to transform into a terrestrial planet?
  • What if Mars used to be like Earth and then they had climate change?
  • Would anyone really miss Space Karen if he and his fuckbois went to Mars?
  • Do I have a Twitter addiction?
  • Why are the Democrats like this?!?!? [re: impeachment, etc.] (This mundane ambiguous question is in my question diary so many times—I’ll refrain from being redundant and try to interpret according to date and news, or not.)
  • Isn’t the Republican party dead as a judicious entity and legitimate political participant in the US government?
  • Why is it when white supremacy domestic terrorism becomes center stage, Middle Eastern terrorist groups reemerge & start popping up in the headlines & on MSM?
  • Why do members of Congress get away with so much more than us regular people would?
  • Why do men have more difficulties adapting but consistently lecture us women on being better at it?
  • Why in the world am I receiving breaking news in which the words “the world’s two most powerful Catholics” are used?? Would you see a headlines like the two most powerful Hindus or Jews or Atheists or Satanists, etc.?
  • Why do people think that Lindsey Graham is being blackmailed? Maybe he’s just an evil amoral asshole like the rest of his crew?
  • Perhaps Jim Jordan is where he is because he ignored the pedos?
  • Am I supposed to laud Nancy Pelosi’s refrigerators as feminism??
  • Where in the world did 200 million gallons of water in an Antarctic Lake go??
  • Is being in congress just another level of their MLM strategy?
  • How many days off do they (congress) get??
  • Am I supposed to feel relieved that JB isn’t thinking of DJT? Is anyone in his administration?? Especially Garland? Are they aware that he and his ilk are attempting another coup? Maybe someone should let them know? They seem to be a bit clueless?
  • What is up with that lackluster-less-than-enthusiastic kiss between Henry Cavill and Anya Charlotra in S2 of The Witcher? Is it because we are in a pandemic and they’re afraid of getting cooties? Does Henry Cavill really not know how to kiss a woman?? I have asked this before, haven’t I? I was rude then too, huh? I mean how hard can it be to kiss a gorgeous person? Despite cameras in your face? Isn’t it called acting for a reason? Shouldn’t they practice a lot?
  • What happened to kisses and nudity and sex (simulated) onscreen in Hollywood? Besides Shonda and Chris, has everyone in Hollywood become prigs and prudes? Is everyone too freaking cheap enough to afford intimacy coordinators? Or has Hollywood been taken over by puritans? More so, that is? What in the hello is going on there? Do we have to go on P*rnh*b to find this kind of acting?? Is mediocrity the new normal?
  • What is the Kent Test??
  • ‘There enlies’? Really? Is there not a literacy test for Congress? Really?
  • Does everyone sell your email address now without permission?
  • Is ‘Don’t Look Up’ supposed to be a comedy? Or horror? Or documentary?
  • Texas and Florida reelecting Republicans just proves that insanity quote, huh?
  • Nancy Reagan was good at wut??
  • Why does that Armie Hammer VF piece make me wanna see him play the Duke of Jervaulx in Flowers from the Storm??
  • WTF is a ‘white boy summer’? Haven’t we always had those?
  • Why do all these billionaires wanna make me write a novel where a billionaire gives away all his $$?
  • Why are they putting so much effort into deifying that old dead white man?
  • Why are people so quick to judge?
  • Does Israel not realize they’ve become the bully?
  • Why do Democrats consistently choose failure over achievement?
  • Are you really blaming people for giving up on Democrats and Congress in general?
  • Why shouldn’t we abolish the Senate?
  • Why shouldn’t there be additional SCOTUS jurists when there are more people now?
  • On Batman not eating pussy: You cannot expect women to date anyone that wouldn’t eat pussy?? Especially a freaking superhero? Does Superman?? Or can he not do that either? And Cavill?? Can you imagine Lois Lane or Amy Adams hooking up with someone that doesn’t kiss good or eat pussy? Don’t you have to kiss good to…nevermind.
  • Am I the only person that hasn’t read that cat person article? Or care?
  • What’s wrong with low rise jeans/pants/skirts/etc??
  • Why did they not run over James Corden??
  • Are our UK brothers and sisters okay over there?
  • Y’all know that chemistry between people who are really fantastic actors and not in love is a thing?
  • Are we being too hard on that Chris?
  • Am I the only one that has a weakness for intelligent smartass sarcastic asshole antiheroes?
  • Y’all realize you can be assholes, don’t you?
  • Doesn’t Gruden remind you of every popular white boy we went to school with?
  • Does anyone else want Lilly, Lana & David to do another series (Sense8) like I want them to do another series??
  • Why don’t we talk about Bruno? He seems the most fascinating character of all, si?
  • Wouldn’t Dune have been a far better series than movie?
  • We’re all just really boring maddening humans, aren’t we? No superpowers and no collective humanity?
  • The cognitive dissonance is real, isn’t it? The study of the human condition is seductive and distressing, isn’t it?
  • Can I not just observe and listen and learn?
  • Will we ever see snow again?
  • Y’all realize the passive voice is used to deny culpability?
  • Can you blame people for not wanting to give up everything even their very lives for $$$ and capitalism?
  • Do people not understand how science works?
  • WILL THIS PANDEMIC EVER END??????

Happy New Year! 😘

© 2021 Matilda London/Pamela Gay Mullins

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